Building A Community You Can Really Depend On As A Single Mom


Ok mamas, let us be real for a minute. As single moms we face a lot of loneliness and even criticism from people in our lives. It can be hard to feel like we have a support system and a community to depend on. So here are some ways to build a supportive group to help you combat the challenges of single mom life.


In moment of high stress, loneliness and flat out parent fatigue, it’s so important to have people we can turn to. Whether it be family members we are close to like parents, siblings, or cousins, to our best friends. Not all of us have people in our lives that are there for us when we need them. Either way, having a strong community to help us on our single parent journey is extremely important.


Reaching out to those already in your life

Not being afraid to reach out is a huge step in making this happen. Pride can sometimes get in the way, or we feel like we don’t want to ask for help and we can handle everything on our own. And I’m sure you totally can, but that doesn’t mean that reaching out to close friends or family on a bad day isn’t a good idea, because it is.


With so much scrutiny and stigma around single moms, I understand sometimes not feeling like you want to come across as not being able to provide for all of your children’s needs or handle all the stress placed on your shoulders. But we all need help sometimes, even if it’s just to vent over a coffee to a friend. I know that I feel blessed to have a small group of friends that I can come to when I need help, it really does help when you have people praying for you or even just listening to you.


So don’t be afraid to reach out, to ask for help when you need it  or even just ask a girlfriend to come over for wine and a chick flick. We spend so much time taking care of our kids, and handling everything on our own that having some time to talk to other adults is a must for every single mom. Find those closest to you and don’t forget that they are there for you.


Finding new support

Looking outside of your friend and family base for further support is another great way to build a community for yourself and your kids. This could mean your neighbors, inviting them over for dinner and games, hosting a block party or even just having the kids play together. If you don’t live in a populated area  with close neighbors, then be on the lookout for community events such as farmers markets, fundraisers and other town events. Introduce yourself to new people, or let your kids do it for you! They are usually pretty good at breaking the ice!


Churches are also a fantastic places to find a community of people you can trust. Some churches have singles groups, or family groups that meet together to plan events you can attend.  I personally attend my church’s young adults group and it has seriously been the best thing ever. I love getting together every week with people my own age to hang out, plan events, do a fun bible study and that will pray for me when I need it. Which is all the time!


So get out here, find what is available in your area and jump in. Surround yourself with new people and new opportunities to grow as a woman, mom and together as  a family. Search Facebook for local information, ask your friends, or church directors, or hey, even start your own group on a site like Meetup. Be a leader and make it happen!


Virtual Support Groups

If you live in a remote area, don’t have family and friends nearby, or just don’t have the time and energy to find and interact with those your local community then finding support online is the way to go. Venting your frustrations is a safe, judgment free zone is a in an online group hidden from the view of your family and ex family is good way to let things out or ask advice from other moms who have walked in your shoes.


There are lots of forums, groups and sites dedicated to single moms where you can engage with all the moms, give support to others, ask your questions, or just have a good laugh at a funny and super relatable meme. Facebook groups like Bonfami’s Private Group for Single Moms are really great about no bullying, bashing, or mom shaming.  This group is really great about no bullying, bashing, or mom shaming. It’s a nice little group of moms just like you and me!


I hope you have enjoyed this post and are feeling more optimistic about the idea of community. It takes a village to raise a child they say, and when you’re a single mom, that saying couldn’t be more true!


Like, share this post, and shine on!

About Bonfami: Bonfami is working to improve the childhoods of kids whose parents have separated or divorced by turning “co-parenting” into collaborative parenting!

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Jesse Murphy

I'm Jesse Murphy, a single mom, and blogger from the California foothills. My main purpose in life to be the best single mom I can be for my son, and to provide support, tips, advice, and fun to all my fellow single parents. Raising kids on your own is never easy, and I know firsthand the struggles we single parents face. Find inspiration, tips and ideas for your co-parenting journey in the Bonfami Community and be sure to subscribe to my personal blog! www.neveralonemom.com.


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